| Author |
Replies: 32 / Views: 2,433 |
|
Moderator
 United States
56855 Posts |
Finally reached the 1000th! so here's my contest to celebrate it. To qualify: You must have 25 or more posts and "not" be a current CCF supporter. One post per member. Contest starts now and ends on 9-11-09 at noon CCF time. What you need to do; Post a Family Friendly joke, not too long(i get bored easy). At the end of the contest I will choose my favorite and that will be the winner. The prize; Highlight to find out; A one month donation to CCF of $5 paid by me and put in the winners name. You will receive a "supporter" designation under your avatar for one month. If you like the look of that you can extend that look at your own expense for as long as you want to. Good luck to all. Make me laugh  John1 We have a WINNER! Go to page three to find out.Edited by John1 09/11/2009 12:02 pm
|
|
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
3077 Posts |
a duck walks into a bar .....
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
8904 Posts |
A loud "Clang!" rang out in the bar as the duck failed to duck the bar.
|
|
Moderator
  United States
56855 Posts |
This isn't going to be another "never ending" story is it?  Thanks for entering the contest but unfortunately neither of you qualify, you can't currently be a CCF supporter, sorry  John1 
Edited by John1 09/03/2009 10:38 am
|
|
Valued Member
United States
290 Posts |
family friendly... hmmm....
Why did the chicken cross the park, to get to the other slide.
|
|
Valued Member
United States
290 Posts |
Alright! Looks like I am running away with this contest!!
|
|
Valued Member
United States
323 Posts |
have you seen the movie constipation? No?!?!?!
that's because it hasn't come out yet!! haha
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
2520 Posts |
A blonde pushes her Mercedes into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it just died! Up and died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, 'What was the problem?' He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor' She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
2520 Posts |
Quote: Contest starts now and ends on 8-11-09 at noon CCF time. OOPS!
|
|
Valued Member
United States
323 Posts |
Blind guy makes his way to the bar and asks the barmaid "wanna hear a blonde joke"?. The barmaid cocks her shotgun and says : "I'm a blonde and I have a gun, the 2 girls on your right are blondes and they are tag team wrestlers, the girl on your left is a blonde tattooed head to foot and rides a harley and the girl behind you now is my bouncer, a blackbelt and is also a blonde. Sure you still want to tell that joke?". The blind guy says...."not if I have to repeat it 5 times."
Edited by coincollectingkid 09/03/2009 8:05 pm
|
|
Bedrock of the Community
United States
10284 Posts |
I know I'm not eligible but I'll add a joke for the fun of it.
There was this guy who just got a new job as a school bus driver for elementary school children.
He thought it would be nice to paint the school bus with characters from Sesame Street. So, he painted Bert and Ernie, Big Bird, The Cookie Monster and so forth.
At his first stop, there was this very overweight little girl. He opened the door and said, "Hi, I'm the new bus driver. What's your name?"
The girl said that her name was Pattie.
Waiting at the next stop was another overweight little girl. He said, "Hi, I'm the new bus driver. What's your name?"
She said that her name was Pattie also.
At the next stop, there was a grown woman and a little boy. The bus driver said, "Hi, I'm the new bus driver. What's your name?"
The woman piped up and said, "His name is Ross and he is my son." She continued, "He is very, very special, so I want you to take extra good care of him." The bus driver replied,
"No problem. He can have this seat right behind me and I can watch him in the mirror."
At the next stop, there was this little country boy standing there. The little boy was wearing tattered overalls and had no shoes or socks on his feet. The poor little boy had problems walking because of bunions all over his feet. The bus driver said, "Hi, I'm the new bus driver. What's your name?"
The little boy replied, "My name is Lester Cleese." Well, little Lester picked at his bunions all the way to the school house, nearly driving the driver crazy.
At home later that night, his wife asked him how his first day on the new job was. The man replied, "Well, I had Two Obese Patties, with Special Ross, and Lester Cleese Picking Bunions On A Sesame Street Bus."
Edited by TNG 09/03/2009 8:18 pm
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
3077 Posts |
all that reading for a pun 
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
792 Posts |
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
1151 Posts |
 My best joke is NOT family friendly. I will have to think about this one.
|
|
Moderator
  United States
56855 Posts |
ratman4762, Thanks for bringing attention to my error on the date of this contest ending, it has been fixed  John1 
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
8904 Posts |
Quote: it has been fixed That's what I say about my dog!
|
| |
Replies: 32 / Views: 2,433 |