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 Replies: 11 / Views: 923 |
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Pillar of the Community
United States
1108 Posts |
Hello, all. I am sure I am not the first one here to lose a parent. It's still fresh in my mind, though. My Dad passed away on January 10th, 2024, nearly two years ago. He died around 3 weeks before his 75th birthday.  Dementia is a horrible disease and it was basically his downfall, and greatly contributed to factors that essentially caused his demise. I still think about him every day and I miss our daily phone conversations at night, him coming over every week to spend time with me and my son, and him just being around in general. The only thing that gives me any kind of solace is the fact that he is no longer suffering and he is at peace. Never had to deal with him going into a nursing home or facility or anything like that, and I'm grateful for that for both his and my sake. Still, it doesn't make it any easier. I feel the hardest thing is trying to get on with getting used to living without someone who has been there your entire life and it's incredibly hard. My son was also only 5 when he died, and that bothers me very much too and I fear he will forget his Grandpa entirely eventually.  Does it ever get better? What helps you for people who have experienced similar losses? Edited by Humanist1287
10/06/2025 11:53 am
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Moderator
 United States
187537 Posts |
I lost my dad a couple years ago, just two months short of 83. He had lived on the other side of the country since 2000, so I did not see him as often as I would have liked. I was much closer to my Grandfather and I lost him in 2006. It still hurts. I cannot say it gets better, but you get used to it.  |
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Moderator
United States
15384 Posts |
Feeling for you @Humanist.
I lost my dad a few years ago and know the good memories never go away and the grief eases with time.
Take a look at my other hobby ... http://www.jk-dk.art |
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Pillar of the Community
United States
6988 Posts |
Lost both of my parents 5 and 6 years ago, I think of them daily (the sign of love I believe) the feeling of grief lessens and the good memories causes the warmth in your heart to grow. Pictures and sorries will help your child remember his granddad....hang in there and remember your dad would not want you to be unhappy
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Pillar of the Community
Australia
9352 Posts |
I lost my father last November at the age of 94, and it was really painful at first. I don't mind saying I cried so hard, I could barely breathe. The pain has subsided, but the pleasant memories live in. I have his picture on my desk and that helps. He will always be in my heart. He suffered for quite a few months, and he had joined the voluntary assisted dying program, but in the long run he didn't need it. When he passed, although we were all immensely sad, at the same time we were glad his pain had ended. RIP in Dad. |
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Pillar of the Community
 Canada
1765 Posts |
25 years for Dad, 8 years for Mom. It still sucks. All the best.
"We are poor little lambs...who have lost our way...Baa...Baa...Baa"
In memory of those members who left us too soon...
In memory of Tootallious March 31, 1964 - April 15, 2020
In memory of crazyb0 July 27 2020. RIP.
In memory of T-BOP Oct. 12, 1949 - Jan. 19, 2024
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Pillar of the Community
United States
1961 Posts |
@Humanist1287:
My father died in 2007; mother died in 2012. I do not think of them every day. There are inexplicable moments that trigger (usually fond) memories of our time together. I do think it "gets better" as time passes and the amount of time varies greatly.
My daughter did not interact with her grandparents at the end of their lives (out of state) so she has childhood memories of RV trips, sleepovers, Grandpa's pancakes, and more.
I hope your son's juvenile memories of your father are reinforced over time by the stories and memories you'll share. As your son ages, his curiosity will lead him to ask about your poppa and your answers will give you more pain-replacing solace.
My own experience: Becoming an orphan was less painful than becoming a widower.
" Even a clock that's stopped is right twice a day. "
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Pillar of the Community
 United States
1108 Posts |
Thanks all. It's reassuring that others know how I feel. Obviously not a good thing, but I'm not alone. I also recently put this up. My extended family got me this last year after finding out my Dad passed. Just haven't thought about it until now honestly.   |
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Pillar of the Community
United States
615 Posts |
Humanist1287, what a lovely tribute and way to remember your father. "In remembrance there is Life."
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Moderator
United States
187537 Posts |
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Pillar of the Community
United States
2330 Posts |
I'm sorry for your loss He must have been a good Father because of the way you feel for him! Like others have said...time heals all wounds. My wife and I keep a beautiful picture of our parents on our mantal to remember them by. I'm also very Blessed to be the only sibling in my family (3 sisters and a brother) that got into coin collecting...my Mom and Dad also collected. I have very fond memories when I look at my collection. This first Holiday season without him there will be a challenge...just remember He's there by your side.  smat |
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Pillar of the Community
United States
2114 Posts |
I'm sorry for your loss, Humanist. I lost my Pops a few years ago, also buried in a National cemetery next to my Mom... Yes, it does still hurt. The good part is that the memory of your Dad will always be with you.... |
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Replies: 11 / Views: 923 |
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Posted 10/06/2025 11:40 am
