| Author |
 Replies: 20 / Views: 2,566 |
|
Valued Member
United States
142 Posts |
I'm 30 years old. My (living) grandpa collects coins, stamps, and currency. Since I was a child, he would encourage coin collecting and give coins occasionally to each of his seventeen grandkids. Throughout my whole life I've been a coin collector (largely because of his influence).
Cutting to the chase, he's seeming older and older every time I see him, and I know that I am the only member of my extended family who is as emotionally invested in coin collecting. Many of his coins come from his father and grandfather, and I don't want them to go to a family member (likely my aunt) who will sell the whole lot with no emotional attachment or proper understanding of their value, etc.
Frankly, I really only care about the coins (never been into stamps, and currency never quite caught on), and even then only the ones of historical family significance. I truly don't care what happens with any coins he potentially bought/buys for financial investment, etc, I don't plan to make any kind of financial profit off of the coins I would receive. I want to preserve them, share the love of coin collecting with future family generations, through them.
Is this a conversation I should have with him? Should I have it with my mom and aunt (his executors) whenever his health goes downhill and/or he passes? Should I just let whatever happens happen and cope with it after the fact?
To be clear, I've tried to make sure he knows I collect coins, but I don't trust that he has a good pulse on how nobody else really does beyond them maybe showing some slight interest in the specific coins he gives them.
|
|
|
|
Moderator
 United States
56855 Posts |
Maybe have a sit down,over lunch or whatever with all four of you and bring up the subject and see where it goes?Or if the collection does not go to you and is to be sold,offer a fair market value to your aunt for the entire collection? John1  |
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
2703 Posts |
Don't miss what is important. Spend time with your grandfather while he is still here. Enjoy the hobby together. Call him up. Share your latest acquisitions. Ask his advice. Go to a coin show together. Ask which specific coins is he still looking for. Help him find them.
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
883 Posts |
It would be extremely crass to raise this subject with your Grandfather, or any other family member for that matter, and you will regret it. Let it go. No matter your intentions, it will be viewed as avarice.
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
2703 Posts |
|
|
Bedrock of the Community
United States
19136 Posts |
Without understanding the family's internal politics, I'd agree with t360 (above). Without going over-the-top, engage with your grandfather in the general pursuit of the hobby. Any dramatic uptick in interaction with him in the coin collecting context is likely to raise red flags. Thin ice abounds.
|
|
Valued Member
 United States
142 Posts |
@t360 I appreciate the reminder to think about the important things. There's 3000 miles between us, and signs of dementia, but I'm trying to at least keep him up to date on my finds, and recently mailed him a few CRH treasures so he can share in the excitement of them (and also frankly there's just no replacement for the excitement of showing him them in-person). @plumcrazy814 this is exactly the perspective I was looking for  Thank you for the clarity. I think I'll follow John1's advice and simply try to fairly purchase what I can when the time comes. Edited by wadahek
11/06/2021 10:03 am
|
|
Rest in Peace
United States
18456 Posts |
When you have a get together with your Grandfather start talking a little about coins and the ones you have so far .Then nonchalantly tell him that you'll be passing down your collection to your kids and Grandkids . Maybe he will say to himself ; Hmm , why didn't I think of that . Just don't say ( Hey Grandpa, Who You Giving Your Coins To When You Pass On ?)  |
|
Bedrock of the Community
United States
94367 Posts |
Does he know of your particular enthusiasm for the hobby?
|
|
Bedrock of the Community
United States
20753 Posts |
I'm at that age where a will is a necessity. My suggestion is to simply tell him to leave his coins to you when that time comes. I just went through a death in family that is a real mess due to a lousy will. Discuss a will and trust with him and other family members.
|
|
Bedrock of the Community
United States
94367 Posts |
Saying something directly would seem inappropriate given that there are 17 grandkids.
Edited by Coinfrog
11/06/2021 4:03 pm
|
|
Rest in Peace
United States
18456 Posts |
I have to agree with coinfrog , you just can't go up to the Grandfather and say : just leave your coins to me when you die because I'm the only grandchild that appreciates all coins .  |
|
Rest in Peace
 United States
1380 Posts |
I seriously disagree with the don't say anything crowd. I am getting where I need to think about what happens to my collection. I got a large start on it from my father's collection when he passed and he asked if I would keep it and not sell it as it meant something to him. I would love for one of my nieces or nephews to ask for it so that I knew it would go to someone who wanted it for what it was and not just something to sell to buy a new sofa or car or whatever. Ask him. He may be hoping for someone to show the desire to have it.
|
|
Pillar of the Community
Canada
5394 Posts |
Agree with a couple of the above comments , don't even think of bringing
It up . Avarice pretty much says it all with 17 grandchildren involved .
If he is a wise man , and by collecting coins I am sure he is , he has
a last will and testament in place . Any spouse or children surely come ahead of you .
You also mention possible dementia . If you wish to stay part of your family
Best let it go and build your own collection .
For all you know the collection could be sold while your Grandfather is still very alive , with the proceeds being used to enjoy his life or used for a nice donation .
Mine , no fighting necessary , the coins go to auction , hopefully while I am
alive , so I can attend said auction . Then I can present the very nice donation in person to the SPCA .
Edited by Pacificoin
11/07/2021 12:14 am
|
|
Pillar of the Community
United States
7010 Posts |
Unless you get the collection soon, just assume it never existed...A Will means nothing.....nothing...greed will overcome the executor. That collection will turn out to be 5 or 6 coins...Whoever lives closest will clear out his home...
Sorry, that's the way I've seen it (too many times)
|
|
Bedrock of the Community
Australia
21786 Posts |
Numismatically, you have the right sort of grandpa. I think it is worth having a conversation with him, but delicate family unwritten protocols may change that. Have a talk with other members of your family first. One possible difference to me is that I have always let be known what the future plans for my collection were going to be. I have simply split my collection into two, divided equally between my kids. The collection would be valued at a few tens of $thousands. Of the exact total value, I have only a vague idea, and I don't really care. They decided how the collection was to be divided. Why should I get a revalue assessment each year, like a greedy king counting his money? Better to give as much of your physical stuff (coins included), away to your beneficiaries, before you die. That is the advice I got from the public auctioneer. They can keep, or sell their own part of the collection as they deem fit for themselves, because they already own the collection. All I have done is spent almost of my life putting the collection together. I have had my fun.  I expect that most of the collection will be dispersed, via public auction. I don't really care. Good family relations are far more important. |
| |
Replies: 20 / Views: 2,566 |
Posted 11/06/2021 03:28 am
